Dress uP: Women’s Mags are Getting LAZY!

8 07 2009


I’ve seen two magazines in two days that boast “The Best Jeans for Your Body EVER!”  Is it me or are women’s magazines getting really lazy with their cover features? 

I ignored the fact that this month’s Lucky--a magazine that I generally enjoy– features teenager Hayden Panettiere next to this lofty jeans claim; let’s face it, an 18 year old is going to look good in just about anything. I should have ignored the entire article because there wasn’t a single thing about what works best for MY body. Instead, there was a six-page spread of really cool, really expensive jeans that would be perfect for anyone size 2 and under. I did not see one pair of thighs touching, one short model or one body with a rump bigger than an apple. And to top it off, out of the 57 pairs of jeans that were featured, only 17 were under $100. Not good for my body, my ego or my budget.

Glamour’s cover feature did only marginally better. They were much more wallet friendly with their picks, but only featured four different body types, none of which my physique comfortably fit into. Kudos for including real women in your feature and not leftover Delia’s models, but if you’re going to brag about the best ever jeans guide, give us some variety!

Here are a few ruminations that I wish the ladies mags would consider addressing:

  • Why can’t women’s sizing be more like men’s? Here’s your waist size, here’s your inseam, thank you and good day! And why is it that Alloy, a teen clothing catalog, is the only place in the world that seems to realize this?
  • Maybe 2% of the people I know can wear designer jeans without shelling out an additional 20 bucks to get them hemmed. If I choose to pay that kind of loot for a pair of quality denim, please don’t add insult to injury with those 34″ inseams.
  • Enough of the super low rise already! Cracks are for sidewalks, not for public viewing.
  • Kate Moss is the only person in the world who looks good in high waisted jeans. Period.
  • An honest sales person is a rarity in this commission hungry world. The best jeans for your body are the ones that make you feel like a goddess in the dressing room. Never forget this.